


Its a small world

by the_charm_caster



Category: Night at the Museum (2006 2009)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-19
Updated: 2013-05-19
Packaged: 2017-12-12 08:26:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/809441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_charm_caster/pseuds/the_charm_caster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The leaders pissed off Larry once again, and this time, the guard decides to teach them a lesson, for good.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Its a small world

No. No. _No!_ This wasn't good! This _cant_ be good!

"Put me down, you-you giant villain! You don't manhandle me! Too sissy to face me and my guns, Right? Hmph! Face me like a cowboy, par'ner!" The little cowboy huffed with anger, but the said 'giant villain' still carried him by his vest. Larry purposefully ignored his battle cries, and looked at the Roman general in his right hand.

"My liege?" The tiny man asked, voice confused and suspicious.

"One sec, guys. You guys are gonna get exactly what you deserve." Larry said, an evil smile on his face. He could take it no more! Numerous chances, he had given to these two leaders, but _no!_ They did not seem to understand that war-time was over. So, it was time to teach them a lesson.

"Put me down now! Or else-" Jedediah was cut short of his threat when Larry switched him from his left hand to his right, gripping him and Octavius in tight grip, and bending down to do something.

"You're crushing me! " The Roman choked.

"Oh! Sorry!" The watchmen loosened his grip, but not loose enough to let the two miniatures escape. He finished doing whatever he was doing and sat straight. Whatever it was Jedediah did not notice. Simply because he was fully squished chest to knee with another man, who was breathing hard on his face. And he bet on the whole sun-sets-in-the-west theory that he had never seen eyes more beautiful or browner than the general's. But of course, he was not going to ever admit that out loud in his whole life.

Larry had pulled out a small chest from somewhere, and he lowered the two men into it.

"You two. You're gonna stay in here till you learn how to behave." The night-watchmen ordered, taking full advantage of his size. Hey! Since he was accused of being some giant monster, he should take advantage of that, right?

"What? In here? With this skirt-wearer?" Jedediah's pitch went a few octaves higher than he liked.

"Jedediah! Mind your tongue, barbarian!" The general spoke up. "It moves faster than this Gargantua himself." He mocked.

"The Gar-whatever being me, I suppose?" Larry asked, innocently. The General simply nodded and turned away, arms crossing in front of his chest. His Roman pride forbade him to tolerate any further.

"Okay guys, look. I'm trying to run a museum here for God's sake. I cant have you two declare wars on each other every night. So, both you can two kiss and make-up right now, or else, I'm gonna lock you up." He regarded them with a stern expression. No matter how much he tried, these two ended up fighting. He thought that maybe after working together against Cecil and others, they would realize the importance of teamwork, but no!

Jedediah's eyes went wide, a light blush creeping across his soot-stained face. "You don't actually mean that, right?" He took the sentence _very_ literally.

But of course Larry did not remember that the two miniatures were from different centuries and had no clue about the idioms and sayings of this century, "Yes. I mean it!" He glared. "Octavius?"

"My honor forbids me to do something this low, my liege. I prefer to be prisoned." The Roman replied, with turning. Thank Jupiter he was wearing his bronze helmet, or else they all would see how embarrassed he was to even think of kissing the cowboy! An adversary! Who had a well built body and a remarkably handsome face, but Octavius wasn't saying anything.

"Fine! Then you two! Even if it takes days, I'm not letting you out unless you decide to be friends."

That's the last thing Jedediah heard before the lid of the chest was pulled down, and darkness swallowed them up.

.

.

.

After minutes of kicking at blank walls and screaming, Jedediah sat down. He, just somehow, knew that Octavius sitting beside him. Maybe because of the exceptionally small size of the box, or maybe because he s _aw_ it, with a small ray of light creeping in from the key hole. It was still hours till dawn.

"Calm down Barbarian." The General's calm voice sounded like pleasant music in the darkness. Wait. _What?_ Jedediah so did _not_ think so. Especially when the Roman was insulting him.

"Calm down? _Calm down?_ How can I calm down when I'm stuck in this box with you, Lolita? I-" Jedediah was cut short of his speech when he felt himself knocked over and pinned down by a very pissed off soldier, his hat rolling away.

"Do. Not. Call. Me. That. Ever again." Octavius said, gritting his teeth. Part of that was because, of course, he was insulted. The sacred toga of a Roman soldier was depreciated. And another reason was the proximity to the cowboy's face. With his hat knocked down, even in this dim light, Octavius could see the sparkling blue eyes, and something inside him did a flip. He slowly crawled away, hoping that the westerner could not hear his heart beat like a young maiden on her wedding night. Now. _Young maiden on a wedding night?_ Where did _that_ come from?

"Okay…Um…Okay." Jedediah of course did not notice the hitch in the Roman's breath. He was busy controlling his own.

Was it too hot in here, or he was the only one who thought so? He sat up straight and peered at the General in the darkness. Octavius took off his helmet and set it down, trying to regain control over his breath. Okay, maybe Jed wasn't the only one who felt the temperature rise.

Maybe it was just the darkness. Or maybe it was the way the dark curls framed his slender face. Whatever it was, Jed peered, straining his eyes, and wishing suddenly that it wasn't so dark in there. NO! What was happening? This was his enemy. His enemy, the one he's supposed to hate. His enemy, with chocolate eyes and pale skin and dark curly hair and rosy lips. Oh boy, how rosy those lips were, nobody could tell better that the Jedediah, who had a nice close up of them when the watchman had held them together in a crushing fist.

"Cowboy?" Octavius pulled him out of his thoughts. Well, thank God he did, or else Jed would have gone crazy. That's when he paused again. The Roman had never called him that before. _Cowboy_. Well, it wasn't anything special. But still, Jed wanted to squeal like a girl.

Not.

No, he did not want to do that. He saw Octavius hovering over him.

"Yea?" He flinched when his voice cracked.

"Maybe we can open the hinges with my sword?"

Jedediah's eyes were better accustomed to the darkness now, and he saw Octavius reach out for him. He took his hand and stood up. And very much like a girl (not!) he did not want to let go of his hand. But his cowboy ego stood forward, and he (regrettingly) let go of the slender pale hand.

"Okay, let's do it, partner!" Jed said with a stupid smile on his face, placing his hat back in the right place.

Octavius stood on the tip of his toes, trying to reach the hinges. That's when the box began to shake. Maybe someone, preferably Larry, was carrying the box somewhere. But Octavius had no time to think, because the shake had misbalanced him and he was about to topple over, when he felt a firm hand on his back.

"Gotcha mate!" Jed grinned.

"I'm grateful, my friend." Octavius decided to ignore the warm hand on his back for a while, and work his way out. By heavens! He could actually feel the sparks that small touch was sending through his body. Maybe he should have put on his helmet, he thought, feeling his face go hot.

Maybe Jedediah could slip his hands around the buckles and belts and open the knots of the metal breast plate, 'accidentally'. Or maybe he could pin the slender man to the walls of the chest and dip a gloved hand into his 'skirt', slowly up that ivory thigh and higher till the other man whimpered for more. That's when he could-

"Jedediah? Are you listening?" Jed blinked when he saw a hand waving in front of his face. The cowboy fully blushed scarlet red, maybe redder than the Roman's said skirt.

"Y-yeah?"

"This is not working. Maybe we should try something else?" The Roman's eyebrows furrowed.

"Uh. Okay?" Jed replied weakly. "Maybe the keyhole?"

"No. No use." Octavius sat down, defeated.

"Oh." Jed sat down beside him.

They sat in compatible silence for a few minutes.

.

.

.

"That gigantor! Wait till I get out of here!" Jedediah exclaimed. "What did you call him? Gator? As in alligator?"

"No." Octavius laughed. "Gargantua. It was a beast that had a big mouth, enough to eat many people at a time."

"Oh. Gargantua. Nice name, Lolita."

"Jedediah!" The General warned.

"Hey, no offense. But you're wearing a skirt. In my lands, that's considered, er, what you call it? Feminine?" The cowboy explained.

"And in my lands, only women have longer hair." The general shot back. Of course he did not mention that Princes and Gods kept long hair too. It was a fact, he wanted to enjoy all my himself. Maybe Jedediah Smith was a God in disguise, with golden locks that shimmered in the fake sun of his Western diorama, every night, when Octavius could see him from his Rome. Or those beautiful angelic blue eyes, they must have descended from Aphrodite herself! "Must I call you my queen then?" Octavius lost track of what he was saying, busy admiring the wild cowboy.

"As you wish, my liege!" Jed bowed, mimicking the Roman accent.

"Heavens! I always thought my lady would be, you know, in a soft pink or white gown, hair decorated with flowers, waiting for me in my chambers or something… But Jupiter! Look I get this savage, face covered in soot and dirt and has no sense how to talk. And oh! Wears trousers instead of a petticoat." Octavius mock-sighed.

"Oh no sweetheart! You want me to please you? I don't need flowers or skirts for that you know?" Jed climbed the general's lap, winking.

 _Oh?_ Octavius raised his eyebrows. Well, two could play this game. "Oh, yes? Then show me, love?" Of course, he felt his heart outspeed Atlanta at this pace.

"Hmmm…" Jed let out a sigh, breathing on the general's lips. "Let me-"

Jedediah was once again cut short. The box shook violently this time, throwing both of them crashing to the walls. Much as they all were plastic and wax when they are frozen, they seem to be real humans, when they 'woke up', with blood and flesh and all.

What the devil was that? Jedediah opened his mouth to curse the watchman, but then he felt the weight on top of him. He swallowed. How was he even supposed to speak when he had a Roman general straddling him, clutching his back hard? It was damn different in the opposite case, but this? This seemed to be a little too much for his pants.

"You okay, Jedediah?" The General asked, getting up, concerned. Jed's heart skipped a beat. But before he could open his mouth to reply, the chest turned again.

This time, Octavius landed on his back, with the Westerner on top of him. Of course it was because of these miniature earthquakes that the general was breathing so hard. Not because his lips were inches apart from a very handsome cowboy.

"Holy hell!" Jedediah screamed when the chest toppled over the third time. Octavius grasped him hard, more because of a protective instinct. But this time when the chest stopped, time stood still with it. And also very still were two small men, so hot and so close and locked in a tight embrace.

When Jedediah regained his senses, he became aware of the slender metal-covered waist he was holding. He instantly thought of letting go, but then he felt the Roman's thighs clenching around his legs, and decided against it.

Jolly heavens! Only he knows how much effort it took him to not kiss the neck in which his nose was now buried.

"Hey…Octavius, you okay?"

But he heard no reply.

The cowboy pulled away and gazed into the chocolate brown eyes. Was it the darkness, or had those chocolate browns gone dark black?

"Sssh, Jed." Octavius sushed him, breath ghosting over the blonde's lips. "I was thinking…maybe we could do what Larry wanted us to." He whispered.

"What? You think he was serious? He couldn't mean that literally unless-" Jedediah was cut short yet once again, with a pair of lips crashing into another. Maybe they all were celebrating don't- let-Jedediah-Smith-finish-his-sentence day, and they forgot to inform him. After a few initial moments of disbelief, he gave himself up into the kiss and kissed back. It was an exotic taste, something sweet and addicting, far more powerful than his moonshine. Something forbidden and chaste.

After a few moments, when breathing became necessary, they pulled away. Sweet Juno! Octavius had no clue that a barba-such a savage could kiss so expertly. And that spicy and wild taste! A foreign delight. He held the stubbled face in his hand and pulled him into another sinful and sensual kiss. When Jedediah threaded his finger in the dark curly locks, he couldn't help but smile. He then felt Octavius smile against his lips.

Maybe Gargantua was not dying tonight.

"Hey Octavius?" Jed said when they pulled back, breathing hard, hands on pale thighs.

"Yes, my liege?" The General stared into the blue pools through the darkness.

Jedediah blushed. Well, he wasn't accustomed to this. "I…uh…your toga? I like it, okay?"

Octavius' eye widened dramatically. "You know it is called a toga?" he asked, sitting up. The cowboy simple nodded, since he couldn't turn away, as a Roman leader was straddling him, pinning him down.

"Then why call it a skirt? And why call me Lolita?"

"I…uh…nevermind." Jed looked away.

"My liege! Why?" Octavius cupped his face and made him look straight into the brown eyes. Well, as much was possible in the darkness, anyway.

"That was the only time you called me by my name…" The cowboy felt his face go hot. "And I like the way you call me, in that Roman tongue of yours…its way, waaay better than those chicks at the salon. And I-"

And he was cut short once again.

"Jedediah." Octavius smiled. The cowboy looked up and smiled at him.

The chest was suddenly filled with light, blinding them.

"Hey guys, you okay?" It was Larry who had opened the lid. "I don't know why, but Dexter and his gang thought this chest was the best thing to play catch with and I-Holy Shit! What the…?"

Obviously the sight was something that could render anybody speechless. With their helmets and hats tossed away, the cowboy pinned to the ground, hands roaming on the other's thighs, and the conqueror straddling him, holding his face in his hands, faces so close, lips red and swollen…Anybody would call this a sight.

"Guys!" Larry's voice changed into a whisper, suddenly respecting their privacy. Of course if he talked louder, the whole museum would know. "You do realize that I was not literally speaking of kissing, right?"

In reply all he got was two blank stares.

"I…uh..um…so, uh, do I get you two out of here or-" He stammered, blushing at the sight.

"Close the lid for now, par'ner" Jed winked.

The Gigantor swallowed and did as asked to. Well, at least now he did not have to worry about the fights, right?


End file.
